It’s finally over, in time for it all to start all over again. As Hillary scoops the Democratic nomination, Spike talks about…. what? Oh, he did? Obama? Really? B-but six months ago… Hmm. It’s finally over, in time for it all to start all over again. As OBAMA scoops the Democratic nomination, Spike talks about the primary as a whole and looks ahead to five more months of this guff, intensified. Well, at least he’ll have plenty to talk about, right? Questions: What links (never a frown with) Gordon Brown to scary mentalist Derren Brown, other than the name? Why is Google turning into an AOL/MySpace hybrid? How well does Tony Blair know his Bible? Who says Britain’s “moral vacuum” is turning formerly good Christians into Islamic fundamentalists, and why? And how does that relate to the apparently moribund world of local radio? What can stop kids smoking and drinking? Are internet users ruthless and selfish? And what’s WITH that slutty mermaid…? All the answers, and much more, are in these eighty action-packed minutes of Rage. Don’t forget to kee pin touch with comments/complaints/factoids/free porn at SpikeShow.com. Does you Facebook? Then join the Rage Machine Co-Conspirators’ Group. Invite a friend. Get that friend to invite a friend. Get that friend’s friend to invite a friend, and so on. It’s at http://facebook.spikeshow.com Less

As Fred Thompson drops out of the republican race for the whitehouse, Spike talks about why it’s a good thing he’s gone and examines his frighteningly extremist record. Politics talk ends at 22 minutes and eight seconds in, by the way. That’s after Spike’s talk radio conscience weighs in. Spike will deal with “this much freaky and scary” when it comes to Google’s information gathering (and their ‘official blob’) but is well impressed that they’re splashing some cash on worthy causes and generating almost a third of their power through solar. All whilst Yahoo is going down the tubes. He suggests a new way to deal with the UK’s problem of the failures of private prisons, talks about prostitution and uses the phrase “here’s the rub” without tying it into anything sexual (shame!), a how-to guide for making a few extra bucks with your webcam, haggis and the lies of the guys who got attacked by a tiger. Less

After an entirely melodramatic introduction, a rundown of his merry maladies, and an earth-shattering announcement, Spike does exactly what he promises not to; talks about American politics. Not for long though. And he does pay a rare compliment to John McCain, so that alone is worth listening for, because it probably won’t happen again. British Prime Minister (Never A Frown With) Gordon Brown wants every Brit to be on the organ donor list by default – Spike, who currently has an uncle in need of a lung transplant, isn’t sure how he feels about it. The death penalty debate comes around again with the release of Ohio death row Scot Kenny Richie, why the people who spent the most on a Blu-Ray DVD player are getting the crappy end of the stick, the Oscars, fakey psychics and the answer to why American Idol isn’t selling records. All that, plus another appearance from Brendan The Iremonger (iremongerlives.blogspot.com) with his traditional Podcast-Within-A-Podcast which, this week, includes Brendan’s fine baritone singing voice belting out a verse of “Jobbie Circus” and plenty of feedback from the cheeky chappies in the peanut gallery. Less

In the first real Rage Machine of the year, Spike talks about the race for the Whitehouse; Hillary battles Obama battles Huckabee battles McCain battles gawd knows who next. Why is Hillary skeevy and untrustworthy? Why is John McCain skeevy and untrustworthy? Why did John Edwards and Mike Huckabee win Iowa but get trounced in New Hampshire? Spike, as usual, has all the answers. Because he’s awesome. Also! MPs in Britain – already paid extremely well – say that there’s no money to give to working stiffs living paycheck to paycheque, but are more than happy to awards themselves a 2% pay increase. You know, for all that good work they’ve been doing. Furtherwards of a talkingness on this feature-length edition, why you didn’t hear the two shows that happened last week, how Old Spike gave his son a fever blister from three and a half thousand miles away, the battle over the next home video format and other geekery, shenanigans, goings on, bedlam and “antics”. For a penny. All that and the podcast-within-a-podcast from Brendan the Iremonger (at iremongerlives.blogspot.com) and the real story of the Jobbie Circus, including the new anonymous website www.thejobbiecircus.com and Spike’s switch to Linux. Want to know what’s coming up on the next show? Watch the show’s topics evolve and get your two American cents (roughly four British pence at current exchange rates) in at the new Delicious page: http://del.icio.us/spikenesmith You know how to get in touch, doncha? TheRageMachine@gmail.com – and don’t forget to become a Facebook Fan of the Rage Machine here: http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=8206375097 Less

A two-man Rage Machine for the last feature-length show of the year, with Spike joined via the magic of Skype by Chimp Jones (of the internet’s “Chimpcasting” fame) to talk rubbidge. There’s belches by request and the shredder makes it’s debut, to deal with the news stories that don’t pass muster. The two talk about the “War on Christmas” and whether it’s anyone else’s business how one spends one’s festive season, and whether the lumpen prolitariat have sacrificed quality for quantity in media. There’s a thrilling second-hand story about the primary school event of the 1980s that attracted all and sundry to see “hands on the floor”, the future of sex, the future of TV and what the aliens will unearth in the ruins of the Earth. In the news, New Jersey gets sent to the shredder, why “values” are on the backburner for republicans and the bank whose half-million pay-it-forward PR campaign gets some rare praise from Spike. All that plus grand theft bike, christmas beer and “CSI: Furry Boot”. Happy Holidays! Less

Following the tidal wave of a request to get this week’s show podcasted (this one’s for you, Paul!) here is the pre-Halloween “really terrible week” catered-by-the-neighbours Rage Machine in which Spike remembers his dead friend, muses over why “trick or treat night” is on the 30th down his way – despite Halloween being on the 31st – and runs down the categories of ToTers, he talks about the “don’t tase me bro” guy, why Australian TV’s ‘worm’ is a good idea, and why a 100 year old mouldy orange is a rubbish museum exhibit. All with his mouth full of candy. You know the drill by now, right? Email TheRageMachine@gmail.com Send a voicemail through http://odeo.com/sendmeamessage/TheRageMachine Join the SNRM Facebook group: http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=5266341551 Less

There’s a brief recap of the last show (which, if you were clever enough and technical enough to decode it, would give you a good ten minutes’ worth of material from last week) before Spike breaks kayfabe and reveals some intimately personal details and has one of his regular and well-worn crisis of confidence. But he’s happy that local blogger The Film Geek asked him to guest review the movie “Michael Clayton”. On the show tonight, why Sean “insanity” Hannity is a better broadcaster than Spike; the cost of the Iraq war, what the cost to translate to per person and how much more Bush wants; a ‘gnarly’ action by an Australian politician which may cost him the PM-ship; it’s tinfoil hats at the ready as Spike expounds on a report that NASA are burying that is more interested in protecting “Wee Johnny CEO’s bonus” than it is the general population; anther reason for the extremists to hate ‘Harry Potter’; “signatures and circles” and, after a “crunchy gear shift”, why the geek will inherit the votes…. Join the Facebook group! http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=5266341551 Email the show! TheRageMachine@gmail.com RSSubscribe! http://feeds.feedburner.com/rage Send a voicemail! http://odeo.com/sendmeamessage/TheRageMachine Visit the Film Geek! http://thefilmgeek.blogspot.com Less

“The owls are not what they seem…” No live show this week – a ‘beast-of’ instead, albeit with ten dazzling minutes of new material, including a nightmarish (and profane) trip around the radio dial, and all too rare appearance from veteran news anchor Smack Torquelson and the “Newsmakers Investigates” team as they bust an internet child predator ring wide open. Rehashed instead of Spike working, a clip from the very first Rage Machine, Old Spike talks about being an “anti-war secular progressive liberal” and his love of the Fox News Channel. Spike prays, he’s rudely awoken by his Geordie conscience and covers a wide range of topics from shows of yore including being called the antithesis of a wine snob, agreeing with Bush on something (in principle), making dog food and glue out of a sporting legend, cutting tongues, fat kids and death by gaming. Phew. Business as usual with the live show and podcast next week, and hugebig props go to WKLC’s Dawn Cox for being such a great bipolar morning TV host. Less

Well, someone’s a little gassy tonight, aren’t they? On the agenda: “a tidal wave of correspondence”, a veritable backlash over Spike’s comments on the Bond franchise last week, which leads into the great man himself saying something he’s never said before… “It appears that I may have been wrong about this.” Another episode of the podcast-within-a-podcast from Brendan the Iremonger, a look at a traditionally liberal civil rights organisation standing firmly behind (but not standing widely beside) a troubled republican senator. Rudy Giuliani marches into “jolly old England” to tell those whacky English types how rubbish their ‘socialized’ heathcare system is. Because he knows all about it, having been in the country for fifteen minutes. Spike expounds on his own extensive experiences with both nationalised and private healthcare systems, which is better and why Guiliani is talking out of his cancerous prostate. Additionally; them foreigners is living longer, how a brown lawn can get you thrown down a flight of L.A. stairs, weird Spike and his multiple phobias and the state of Chernobyl. Less

Note! Following overwhelming listener demand, the Rage Machine mp3 is now a smaller file size (around 30mb) with little to no reduction in sound quality. Technology RULES! LOTS to talk about this week! Spike is still enraged by the actions of a group of anti-choice protesters and what they tried to show his daughter, he talks exclusively to the man who has the final word; Jesus. He’s disappointed that, being on weekly, he’s late to the party to talk about Britney Spears’ infamously lackluster VMA performance and Chris Crocker’s tearful meme that followed. But that won’t stop him playing it over some really sad music. Why did Bin Laden dye his beard? Is it some sort of message? Some signal? Is something big about to happen? Spike has a good idea why and does the unthinkable… humanises the terrorist leader. The disappearance of the British four year old girl is still ongoing (and going and going and going), Spike gives an update, drops a “Casablanca” quote and stays quiet for an uncomfortable amount of time to prove a point. The peanut gallery is quick to cry “HERPES” when Spike talks about his fever blister and why he’s being forced to drink like he’s had a stroke, there’s another welcome rebuttal-o-sense from Brendan The Iremonger (iremongerlives.blogspot.com) and when is a hate crime not a hate crime…? That one’s up for discussion. Spike hands in his Man Card, declares his intense, burning hate for the James Bond franchise and summarises all 22 of the movies in less than a minute. But he LOVES Harry Potter. Comments? Love ‘em! Leave them here at the blog, or email TheRageMachine@gmail.com Or text/voice/whatever your comments here: http://odeo.com/sendmeamessage/TheRageMachine Less

There’s something different from last week… can you figure out what it is? Spike tells us about a decade-old agreement he has with the National Organisation For Women and why people call him “Mister Merrick” for a few days every year and “gay” in the summer. In the news, a little look at some in-fighting in the Democratic primary hopefuls, an emailed rebuttal after Spike’s comments about John Edwards last week, why John McCain is “the tracing-paper candidate”, he discusses a new snowjob book about W’s presidency and why he’s now worried about his historical legacy, and what links JFK to Benny Hill…? Spike, as usual, has the answer. Finally, what Spike REALLY thinks about Jerry Lewis and drops fifteen… count ‘em… FIFTEEN masturbatory euphemisms. Give this man an award. Less

Spike realises that he is not a beer snob, after a bargain buy inspires him to start drinking “fizzy piss”. He compares his sleepy former home town to the bustling metropolis of his current home town of Charleston West Virginia that has half the population… but it has tall buildings, and that “impresses the crap” out of him. In the news, Britain has a new Prime Minister – the old one can’t keep out of the limelight and takes a job as aggravator-in-chief of the Middle East. Great. But at least Blair wasn’t dull to watch, right? The Bush administration are going on a secret “accidental shredding” phase as the subpoenas arrive over warrantless wiretapping, Spike makes his patsy prediction. Is it right to shoot and kill a kid who continually throws rocks at your house? Spike shares a story from his childhood and gives a somewhat controversial answer. Spike the angry immigrant gets angry about immigration and why some nations (ie, not his) are given preferential treatment when it comes to procedures when he had to jump through multiple hoops. Finally, in a war between MySpace and Facebook, one comes out on top when it comes to rich kids, and the death row inmate who choked on a joke. Less

“Go Raiders.” Spike’s fed up and miserable and needs to go to a funeral to remind himself of why he shouldn’t just cash in his chips and be done with it. What’s bumming Spike out this time? Mostly, gas prices. He won’t bore you with the story of how a fat, speccy guy from West Central Scotland ended up in West Virginia, but he will spend several minutes explaining why you are not Scottish/Irish/Italian/whatever, and will spend most of the show whining about rich people and paying $3.44 per gallon for gas. Incidentally, Spike’s about seven or eight million heads short for the revolution. Anyone want to help? Oh – and also, Deeds wants to know why a 44 year old man can’t buy beer and Spike plops on his tinfoil hat and wonders about election-rigging in Florida… not that it matters anymore, since they are now getting rid of electronic voting machines. Woot! email the show: theragemachine@gmail.com Skype: Taskerlands call: 206-600-5774 Less

Spike drops a bombshell about the future of the “Rage Machine”. Wow. Of a talkingness this week, our hero kills something until it’s “deeeeaaaaaad” but still fails to impress his coworkers, there’s updates on the little girl lost in Portugal and why it’s getting out of hand, the British Ministry of Defence have come out and said that your kids are less valuable than a do-nothing, red-faced, anachronistic figurehead, so they won’t be sending Prince Harry to Iraq. Surprise? Noooo. Also on the agenda, XM Satellite Radio’s decision to can shock jocks Opie and Anthony for a month and whether this has an effect on free speech, there’s a ten month old kid in Illionis with a gun permit (really!), Spike gives us a lesson in impersonating Tony Blair and Gordon Brown and he gets “so blazingly angry that my face will go red, my fists will shake and the red mist will descend” about something. Podsafe music this week by Megaphone, singing the very excellent “Not Your Enemy”. Less

He’s back, and badder than ever! (that’s not bad meaning good, bad meaning ‘no talent hack’... just to clarify) Armed with a sheaf of shite, Spike lends his terse vocal cords to several news stories. The missing English girl in Portugal and why her moron parents are to blame for her disappearance – drugs: a new drug for kids (and Spike) called “cheese” and why the new statistics that claim 10% of the US population have experimented with drugs is way too low – a Chicago law firm’s billboard proudly proclaims “Life Is Short: Get A Divorce”. Good or bad? – can we convert our gas-gussling cars into coconut-guzzling cars? Yes, according to New Guinea! How long before Big Oil® smashes it like a bug…? – New Jersey about to abolish the death penalty? Believe it! Spike supports keeping it, but not for murderers, only for “wee bastards” – ...and Paris Hilton. Ugh. And there’s music by The Switch, performing their tip-top, toe-tapping tong, “Trini”. Less

Another full Rage Machine, beginning with a custom-made intro by listener Maz. She gets the name wrong, but hey… Gordon Brown, the soon-to-be PM of Grrrreat Brrrritain is suggesting that new immigrants be forced to do voluntary work, Spike gives his three cents about immigration and why there’s no point in him becoming a citizen. Is the term “illegal alien” offensive? Accoring to a senator in Florida… yes. And according to the House Of Lords, “bloody foreigner” is a term of abuse. Spike gets hip to the talk radio jive and coins a well-worn phrase. Spike takes the odd step of defending teenagers’ repuations (write down the date, it probably won’t happen again) There’s also death, games and fatness. What’s not to like? Listen carefully – not only are there several planes wooshing overhead, but it’s painfully obvious that Spike’s smoke alarm needs a new battery, too… Less

On this edition, we’ll examine the dog outside the window. No, wait. Scratch that. Being talkered this time, NASA’s new pitch for a sit-com about a whacky diaper-wearing “astronaughty”, there’s the… oh! Look! The dog’s sniffing at something now! Ha! ..sorry. Is romance dead? It bloody well should be in schools, that’s for… is that snow outside? Cooooool!! ahem Getting back on track, romance is dead in schools and there’s a hideously short discussion about politics and who will be the nominations for both parties in the… NO WAY! That dog just tried to eat a bird. WOW! I-pods? Should you be fined for listening whilst you’re… Aw. The dog’s gone now! Maaan! Um. Yeah. So… uuhh.. umm… listen, ok? Less

Coming back just in time to go away again for the Christmas break, The Rage Machine makes a triumphant return with just minor technical difficulties. On the show, can someone be both victim and perp? Is Mary Cheney – daugher of Vice President Dick – a big, gay sell-out? All that and the biggest, most important, scandalous news of the day. There’s an important interview with Jonathan Ochre of government department FMAW and Smack Torquelson makes a triumphant one-time return with the interview of the century. Oh – and SKYPE WORKS! So we’ll take a few calls. Count how many times he gives out the Skype Name. Keep in touch! http://odeo.com/sendmeamessage/TheRageMachine TheRageMachine@gmail.com Less

A COMPLETE SHOW! FINALLY! Woot, as the kids like to say. In this exciting episode of THE SPIKE NESMITH RAGE MACHINE, our hero – apparently hyped up on something – excitedly discusses his unpopular love for mid 80s depress-o-matic band The Smiths, he talks about Michael J Fox’s recent political support ad and Rush Limbaugh’s controversial comments about it and makes a few of his own all whilst auditioning his new and imaginary political campaign in which he reveals exclusive proof that his imaginary opponent is a douchebag. He yaks a (brief) storm about Iraq, about a man who (gulp) raped a dead dog (no, really!) and about prostitution. Sounds like someone has something on the mind! But it all starts with a short, but relaxing, meditation and prayer. Aaahh. All in all, what a show. Best one he did in at least a week. Don’t be afraid to email or leave an Odeo comment. That would, in fact, be rather nice of you. http://odeo.com/sendmeamessage/TheRageMachine TheRageMachine@gmail.com Less

A few technical difficulties (including P&S’s sprawling studio complex being plunged into darkness thanks to a passing storm) but otherwise our heroes discuss the ongoing war on terror and some privacy issues raised by a story about a Seattle feller’s collation and posting of perverts’ private parts. Oh, and “American Idol”. Spike seriously considers getting rid of his PC and upgrading to a Commodore 64, whilst Paul grieves over his lost Atari. Smack Torquelson’s “Newsmakers” team have exclusive access to Osama bin Laden’s chilling new message and cover the closure of 880 WKKK, Ham County Kentucky’s white supremacist radio station. Meanwhile, Paul gets some homework from Spike and has until the next broadcast to watch and review a full episode of the classic “Tiswas”. As always, you are more than welcome to comment on the stories we cover or the show itself at PaulAndSpike@gmail.com – if you have any suggestions for other shows for Paul to review, we’d love to hear them at the same address. Less