Questions I received on Kabbalah’s view of this world: Question: Would it be fair to say that Kabbalists are the Creator’s agents in this world? My Answer: This wouldn’t be very modest, but that’s correct! Question: Does Bnei Baruch plan on creating a virtual society? My Answer: That is exactly what Bnei Baruch is doing: correcting ourselves and educating the world. Question: I am Catholic. Do I need to change my religion in order to study Kabbalah? My Answer: No. Question: Does wearing the Star of David around your neck carry any significance? My Answer: None that’s spiritual. Question : What should be done if a person has cancer, suffers from terrible pains, and wants to commit suicide? My Answer: They should receive medication. Question: What is your opinion on self-defense and martial art? Does a person have a right to protect himself against violence? And do nations have the same right - i.e., are there “just wars?” My Answer: Yes. Related Material: Laitman.com Post: Kabbalah for Everybody Laitman.com Post: The Kabbalistic Meaning of the Star of David, and Why We Should Respect Sports Stadiums Laitman.com Post: What Do a Healthy Mind and Body Have to Do With Kabbalah? About Bnei Baruch Fighting Terror the Right Way Share This Less

A question I received: What is “the evil eye”? My Answer: When I look at others, my egoism evokes feelings of envy, hatred, and a desire for power. I don’t wish others well, or at least I don’t want them to do better than me. If I wish them well and want them to succeed, then it’s only in order for everyone to see that I’m even more successful. Since we’re all interconnected, this “evil eye,” or this desire, influences others. Our life is a proof of that. This is what my teacher Rabash explained. Our desires work for us or against us, since we’re connected in a single system. Our desires “wander” inside this system, and we can’t escape our influence on everyone and their influence on us. Our thoughts about one another and about the world as a whole have produced our mutilated world and our sick society. We are the cause of all our suffering. Related Material: Laitman.com Post: The Mind Is a Servant of the Desires Laitman.com Post: By Changing Our Intentions, We Change the Whole of Reality Laitman.com Post: A Game Is a Serious Affair Article by Rabash “Love of Friends” Share This Less

A question I received: As one who struggles with being an egoistic altruist, I’d like to know what advice you can give us when we wear ourselves down to the point where we are no good to anyone? My mother used to say, “If you don’t look after yourself; you can’t look after anyone else.” I haven’t yet been able to discern some kind of “magical line” that tells me to stop looking after others and look after myself. My Answer: You won’t be able to change without the Upper Light, but will always apply your egoism in different ways that appear altruistic, but are really egoistic underneath. Only the Upper Light which created egoism can correct it. We draw the Upper Light upon us through our studies. We have to approve of the way it will change us ahead of time, because right now we are unable to imagine our new, altruistic form. Therefore, you should only study and “take less care” of others, until you understand how to do it correctly. Some people are unable to study; they can only “act.” They should follow the advice of Kabbalists on how to help others. Otherwise, the help turns into harm for the giver and the receiver. Related Material: Laitman.com Post: The Source of All the World’s Problems Laitman.com Post: The Book of Zohar. Chapter “Raising a Prayer” – 2 The Path of Kabbalah - Chapter 3.1 “Altruism” Free online Kabbalah course Share This Less

Two questions I received on religious observance: Question: Weren’t the great Kabbalists such as Rav Ashlag , Moses Cordovero, and others religious? And why do you wear a Kippah (skullcap)!? My Answer: You must distinguish between religion and a nation’s tradition or culture. When Baal HaSulam uses the word “religion,” he means only Kabbalah, which is for everyone. On the other hand, when he wants to speak about what we usually call “religion” in our world, he says “tradition” or “ethics (Musar).” See the article “The Essence of Religion and Its Purpose.” Therefore, Baal HaSulam writes that even after the full correction of the world, when everything will be revealed to all and there will be no place for faith (because “Everyone will know Me, from the smallest to the greatest”), the traditions will still remain as people’s culture. This is why I, who already live in this future, still respect the traditions of my nation, such as its holidays and other customs. This is also why I wear a Kippah (skullcap) and observe the rituals. After the general correction of all souls in their earthly, bodily form, the souls will unite together into a one true soul of Adam on the level of the World of Infinity. At the same time the part of the souls that gives them a feeling of this world will also be corrected, and hence the perception of matter will also disappear. We will then continue to exist only in the form of the single soul of “Adam.” Question: Why are there spiritual actions that we need to observe on the earthly level (such as Maaser, study, dissemination, and the group), as well as actions that we don’t have to observe physically (such as laying on the Tefillin)? My Answer: Because actions such as Maaser, study, dissemination, and the group are real, whereas the others are still irrational for now, on your level, because you don’t yet have a screen to observe them. Regarding the actions that have a consequence in our world and the Upper World, each action is realized on its level and higher. The traditions should be observed by those to whom they belong by birth. This is one’s culture. Those from the nations of the world (non-Jews) who want to advance spiritually, don’t have to observe the corporeal traditions designated to Jews. When you will gradually acquire a screen and start working with it, this is called observance of 613 commandments (correction of your intentions over 613 desires of the soul from “for yourself” to “for the Creator”) through 613 corrections (Tariag Eitin) and 613 fulfillments (Tariag Pkudin). You will start observing them yourself, as it is written, “A person’s soul teaches him.” Related Material: Laitman.com Post: Religion’s Place In Our Lives Laitman.com Post: Why Does a Kabbalist Wear a Skullcap? Kabbalah Today Article: A Mitzva Baal HaSulam Article: “Building the Future Society” Shamati #77: “One Learns from One’s Soul” Share This Less

Questions I received from women on connecting spirituality with this world: Question: I’ve been studying Kabbalah with Bnei Baruch for two years, and at the same time I earned a degree in Economics. However, I don’t feel any desire to advance in the material life. My family is worried about my apathy. Is it possible to balance work in finance with spiritual growth? Also, how can I influence my family, who think that a woman has to act the way society expects her to? My Answer: Your actions mustn’t harm your family, and everyone should feel that you are part of the family. You can study Kabbalah only if everything is normal in your regular life, and to the extent your free time allows for it. Question: My daughter is so engrossed in Kabbalah that the rest of the world means nothing to her anymore. She puts Kabbalah before everything and doesn’t want to do anything else. She’s not interested in going to a university or working, and claims that she has the right to live however she wants to and doesn’t have to follow the social norms. I feel like we’re losing our daughter and the society is losing a citizen. She used to be a very successful student and this is the result. What should I do? My Answer: Anyone you ask will confirm that I encourage people to get a profession, to create a family and so on, because the only way a person can correct his or her self and reach the Upper World is from a “normal” position in this world. Either your daughter doesn’t understand this or her profession isn’t practical; one that won’t allow her to make a living. Question: Please help me understand the connection between spirituality and corporeality. On one hand, the material world is the world of effects, and on the other hand, it has nothing in common with the spiritual world. Where is the boundary that marks the end of spirituality and the beginning of corporeality, which isn’t connected to spirituality at all? My Answer: The boundary lies in the gap between the two worlds, because they’re both felt within a person. One is felt in the intention “for the sake of oneself,” and the second - in the intention “for the sake of the Creator.” Related Material: Laitman.com Post: Get A Job Laitman.com Post: Family, Children, Work and Kabbalah Laitman.com Post: Corporeality Has No Effect On Spirituality Share This Less

I participated in two conversations for the TV Series “The Butterfly Effect.” One was on the social economy, and the second - on the global solution to the economic crisis. Speaking with me were: Shlomo Maoz – the chief economist at Excellence Nessuah Investment House (right); Avihu Sofer – the manager of our publishing department at the Kabbalah Academy (middle). Shlomo Maoz is a famous international economist, who predicted a number of trends in the global economy, and whose forecasts and advice are valued in the financial market. In this case he again expressed the most correct solution from the perspective of common (egoistic) sense! However, Kabbalah’s point of view is different. His advice on how to overcome the financial crisis is the following: 1. We have to return to “life at home,” work less, restrict the high-tech industry and the Internet, spend more time with our families and maintain a small community. The Internet is the source of the crisis because it has connected the whole civilization on earth into a “small village” (see my comment #1 below). 2. More women should be appointed to management positions because women make business less egoistic, more sensible and flexible, and less arrogant. This advice clearly echoes the history of Ancient Babylon: 4500 years ago, the ancient Babylonian civilization - which included all of humanity within a closed area – began to experience a global crisis of a “small village”: People discovered that everyone depends on everyone. Every person’s egoism was exposed to the maximum (allegorically speaking, they wanted to rise up to the heavens). Everyone’s hatred for everyone was revealed; people stopped understanding each other (allegorically speaking, their languages became confused). Then two propositions emerged: Abraham proposed for everyone to unite “as one family,” which is what Nature compelled them to do. This union could be achieved by using the science of Kabbalah that he revealed. Others, led by Nimrod, were against this, and since the other path was egoistically clear to everyone, the majority of the people accepted it. Hence they scattered all over the earth, destroying the connections of a “small village” among each other and annulling the globalization. This is what Shlomo Maoz proposes we do today. The proposition is correct and addresses the problem. However, in our time it cannot be the solution. It is similar to other “solutions,” such as how to break our relationships by means of another world war, or to discontinue our communication artificially. However, there is no going back because today our egoism embraces the entire civilization on earth. The science of Kabbalah says that we cannot go our separate ways peacefully a second time. Instead, mankind will all but destroy itself by engaging in the Third and Fourth nuclear World Wars. Then only a few people will remain on the Earth, and they will nevertheless correct themselves (our souls) and will attain the goal of  creation - similarity to Nature (the Creator). In the past, only a few people heeded Abraham’s advice. They later became known as Israel, which means “straight to the Creator.” Today, just like Kabbalah had predicted for thousand years, we find ourselves in the same situation. However, the solution isn’t to disconnect, as this will bring about Nazism and cause us to annihilate each other. The solution lies in creating an even greater connection with each other! Therefore: Mankind must resolutely restrain all extremists and people who aim to disconnect us, even if it will have to resort to physical coercion. For the sake of survival, every person has to be satisfied with the necessities (see my comment #2 below) and contribute all the excess of his labor to the well-being of the entire society. All mass media and educational systems must provide a global education for mankind. My Comment #1: Today humanity is experiencing a period that’s similar to the mid-life crisis of an individual. The inertia to move forward that started at birth is running out. Now we have to progress consciously, by our own efforts. We have to understand where we are moving and why: what is the goal? When a person doesn’t understand his goal at mid-life, he starts resorting to extremes: earning a bundle of money,  remarrying someone younger, and so on. His greatest fear is to remain alone with his own thoughts and the ultimate question: “What is this all for?” This is why now, as strange as it may seem, society is somewhat happy to encounter the financial crisis, because it can hold it accountable for all the incomprehensible negative phenomena it has been facing over the recent years, such as the lack of a clear direction for further development, a dead end in international relations, and geopolitical changes. Now there is an understandable common problem that has to be combated. All the rest can be put aside for the time being. My Comment #2: Let’s recall an example of the right attitude to the world as told by the Biblical story about the heavenly manna. The people were instructed to gather exactly as much as they needed to eat in one day. All the excess would spoil overnight, because it didn’t belong to them! So, the current crisis is teaching us to get rid of the excess. When the crisis deepens and spreads even more, people will start thinking that it’s useless to make such great efforts to gather something that will spoil anyway. For more on this, see the newspaper “The Nation“, the book From Chaos to Harmony , and my lecture in Arosa. Related Material: Laitman.com Post: Talks on Globalization and the Financial Crisis Share This Less

A question I received: Is it correct to say that the Path of Light does not take away the problems in a person’s life, and it’s just that someone following the Path of Light perceives them differently? Since that person is on a higher level, he doesn’t have the same problems as in the past because his attitude to them has changed, or rather, his attitude to the source of the problems. However, when a person following the Path of Suffering receives the same problem, he feels bad. My Answer: That’s absolutely correct! We exist in a field of Upper Light (the quality of bestowal and love). This field consists of concentric spheres, and the closer a sphere is to the center, the more intense its quality of bestowal and love is. Everything is static; only we move through this field and change our perception by changing our qualities. A desire, or the single soul, was created in the center of all the spheres. It then moved away from the center, losing its quality of bestowal and love, and then broke into pieces (the particular souls). Thus it acquired the opposite quality – reception (egoism). Because of this, it now exists in the most remote sphere of the field of Light. The souls have “positions” relative the Light just like a charge has a position in an electric or magnetic field. A soul’s connection with the Light (a charge’s connection with the field) happens through balance (similarity) of their qualities. If the qualities of the Light (field) and the soul (charge) are the same, then the soul (desire) feels that it is at equilibrium. In other words, there’s a balance of the soul’s forces or qualities with the Light’s. They’re in a state of homeostasis. When the souls move away from the center to the periphery (when they descend through their qualities), they retain a Reshimo (record) about every state they go through. When the souls reach the maximum distance from the the center (from the Creator, because their qualities are opposite to Him), a recording of the whole chain of separation (descent) remains embedded in them. The souls (egoistic desires) perceive the most remote state as a person (soul) in this world (field). From this moment on, the souls begin their way back. At first they advance toward the goal of creation unconsciously, under pressure that emerges due to the nonconformity of their qualities to the qualities of the spheres of Light that they pass. The souls feel suffering, which is a feeling that comes from the opposition of their egoistic qualities and the qualities of the Light. The greater are the Reshimot that become expressed in a soul, the more the soul is pushed to the inner spheres in the field of Light. Or stated differently, the greater the nonconformity between the uncorrected Reshimo and the corrected Light, the worse a person feels (and the same can be said for the society as a whole). Starting from a certain sphere in the field of Light, the Light’s influence on the Reshimo elicits a recognition of the cause of the suffering. This is expressed as the question about the meaning of the suffering, about its reason and purpose. It is a question about the meaning of life. A person is then brought to the group (the environment) where he can start correcting himself to become similar to the Light (bestowal). “It always seems that we are loved because we are good. But what we don’t realize is that we are loved because those who love us are good.” Leo Tolstoy Related Material: Laitman.com Post: Everything Is Done By the Light Laitman.com Post: A Reshimo is One’s Complete Future State Laitman.com Post: Why Do We Feel Suffering? Interview With the Future - Part 6: “The Creation of the Reshimot” Introductory Course to Kabbalah - Lesson 3: The System of Reshimot (Records) - the Development Software Share This Less

Two questions I received on choosing the correct environment: Question: After reading the article “The Freedom” and other articles about the environment, I came to the conclusion that the environment is pivotal to one’s development and attainment. What should I do if I’m not sure that I’ve chosen the right environment and the right group? My Answer: Keep studying and discerning this! Don’t rely on your own opinion nor the opinion of those around you. The answers should come on their own, from within you (from the Creator), without any external influence and without you eating yourself. Read Baal HaSulam and wait for the answer! Question (from a woman): I would really like to understand what it means to “build your environment.” Should I look for the correct environment within the Kabbalistic group, meaning an environment within an environment, based on the principle that those who don’t give me joy and inspiration are not advancing along the right path and it’s best to avoid them? My Answer: For a woman, there’s no such thing as a group; there’s only the environment. In it she interacts with the women she feels closest to. And she isn’t obliged to do anything more than that. Related Material: Laitman.com Post: Advice for Beginners - Find the Answers Inside Yourself Laitman.com Post: How Does “Love Thy Neighbor As Thyself” Apply to Women? Lesson on Shamati #42: “What is the Acronym ELUL in the Work” Shamati #77: “One Learns from One’s Soul” Share This Less

Three questions I received on balancing spirituality with this world: Question: I heard you say at the children’s lesson that we should envy people who contribute to the group and love others. Should I lie to myself, telling myself that I envy those who contribute even though in reality I envy someone who has a new car, for example? Please give me advice on what to do according to Kabbalah. My Answer: Continue studying; the group and the lessons will give you the feeling that other values are more important. This is better than surrendering yourself to accumulating things and later finding yourself disillusioned. The Upper World that will start being revealed to you will make you feel vastly more fulfilled than a new car. The car is important to you because society values it. But if your society will value other things, your preferences will change as well. Question: Sometimes I get angry at the Creator, but in truth I get angry at myself because I ask myself, “Why is the process of correction so lengthy!?” And then I answer myself: “Because I don’t make enough efforts!” My Answer: You lack the pressure of the correct environment. Question: I’m having an inner debate: on one hand, I have a new job that’s interesting to me and gives me free time to improving my professional level in order to have a good permanent occupation in the future. On the other hand, I don’t have much energy left after the morning lessons, so I’m thinking of cutting them down, yet this bothers me. What’s the right attitude to have to this situation? My Answer: You have to finish your professional education so you’ll be able to support yourself and your family, while keeping the study of Kabbalah “on a low burner.” However, in all other respects, devote yourself to the study of Kabbalah. If you keep this balance of time and energy, you’ll succeed in both. Related Material: Laitman.com Post: Influence of the Environment Laitman.com Post: Kabbalah and Choosing a Profession Laitman.com Post: Family, Children, Work and Kabbalah Chapter from Book Kabbalah for Beginners: “Changing Society to Change Myself” Rabash Article: “Purpose of Society” Share This Less

We had a special guest today on The Bigg Success Show . Adam Shepard is the author of Scratch Beginnings. After graduating from college, he conducted a real-life experiment, by starting out homeless with only $25 and the clothes on his back, to see if the American Dream is still alive. His book chronicles his year-long journey. Here’s a summary of the conversation … ___ ___ ___ I loved your book, Adam. There were times when I couldn’t put it down because I was worried about you! I can’t imagine what your mom and your dad must have felt. ___ ___ They definitely did not sleep much on that first night … that’s for sure. ___ ___ I can imagine, because your first night was quite traumatic. ___ ___ I was in Charleston, South Carolina. There’s the Rhett Butler “Gone with the Wind” side of town, but then there’s also the other side of town. I arrived in a pretty shady part of town, so I think my parents were right to be a little bit nervous. ___ The “Scratch Beginning” ___ Let’s go back to the “scratch beginning” because you didn’t have to be homeless. You had just graduated from college. ___ ___ Yeah, I graduated from college and told my mom and dad I was going to be homeless for a year. The project was for me to start with $25 and the clothes on my back, in a city randomly chosen out of a hat, to see if in one year I could have $2,500, a car, and a furnished apartment. For me, that was the idea of the American Dream. ___ ___ You had some rules. You weren’t able to use your old contacts, your credit, or anything. ___ ___ Right – and no college education. The whole idea is that I was starting from scratch. I had to take blue-collar work. I couldn’t just go out and get a job as an accountant. I tried to level the playing field as much as possible. ___ ___ And why? Why did you want to do that? ___ ___ I wanted to represent a story that many people can resonate with. I didn’t want to use any special skills or talents. I’m just a regular guy and that’s what this story is all about – regular guys that I met along the way that are making things happen. There’s no trick here that I’m using. ___ ___ So now going back to that first night, you really got lucky twice. ___ ___ And not getting lucky the way you want to get lucky in college either! ___ ___ That’s how I could have spent my $25! There was a lady who told me where I needed to go; she could see that I was a stranger to town. So she told me to go to the homeless shelter. As I was waiting at the bus stop, I had a confrontation … well, a near confrontation. I thought he wanted money, but he didn’t. There was just this miscommunication. I narrowly defeated the book being just twelve pages long by getting on the bus and heading down to the shelter! ___ Moving Out ___ So tell us, how did you start working your way out of the shelter? ___ ___ The shelter was great because I had a place to sleep and hard boiled eggs in the morning. So I was able to save my money instead of having these expenses. So that was the whole idea – to put money away – as opposed to spending it on other things like beer, cigarettes and lottery tickets. I wanted to save my money. For the first two weeks, I did little day labor jobs – anything I could get my hands on to get money today for things I needed right away – pants, shirts, shampoo, and I’m a total pretty boy so I needed conditioner. But then the idea was for me to get a permanent job where I had money coming in and I could control the money going out. ___ ___ You say that the shelter was great. I know from reading your book that there were some things that weren’t so great. You make it sound really easy – you were living for free, you could go and get a job – but some people don’t leave the homeless shelter. What do you think is the reason for that? ___ ___ I know that when I do interviews it sounds like this was just a walk in the park. When you read the book, you see that it was much more challenging than that. I think the difference between one guy, who’s able to make it out, and another guy is so complex. There are all kinds of dynamics – mental illness, addictions – that plays into this. But if you put a healthy guy next to another healthy guy, the one who has the better attitude, that strong work ethic, and who wants to get out, he can get out. I think that’s what is so great about my experience in the shelter. I made it out; I did it. But there were guys right along side me that had these plans – to get out of there in 30, 60, or 90 days. They had that attitude and focus to get out. ___ ___ I know your major wasn’t sociology but this was an amazing sociological experiment. You did this from “scratch beginnings” as you say. To me, your story illustrates so well how any of us can get to that next level in life. It’s the same thing. One person will make it; another person won’t. It comes down to attitude, focus, setting realistic goals and a number of complex things as you said. ___ ___ Absolutely. I think that’s why I’m so passionate about this story now. Whether I’m speaking to a college, a corporation, or a homeless shelter, it’s the same! It doesn’t matter if you have $25 or $25,000. It doesn’t matter what kind of educational background you have. There’s somebody out there just like you that’s fighting and clawing for the top. That’s why it’s always a hustle. The American Dream and the American spirit exist at every socio-economic level. That’s where I think the value in Scratch Beginnings is. You can read it and it relates to your life no matter where you are. It’s always a hustle! ___ Learn more about Adam and purchase his book at scratchbeginnings.com. Next time, we’ll continue talking with Adam and find out how one shelter resident helped him turn things around. Until then, here’s to your bigg success! Subscribe to The Bigg Success Show in iTunes.  Subscribe to the Bigg Success feed. Direct link to The Bigg Success Show audio file: http://media.libsyn.com/media/biggsuccess/00278-120308.mp3 Related posts Finding Your Passion One Week at a Time Less

Three questions I received on women’s work in Kabbalah: Question: What is a woman’s role in Kabbalah? My Answer: Both in our world and in the society of the future, which will be corrected from egoism, a woman is a full fledged half and more, because all people complete each other in a single system. A woman can feel her own perfection and full value only through self-correction, by becoming loving and bestowing to the entire world. It’s precisely in her corrected state that the female part of the common soul feels equal, or even greater than everyone, because precisely the desire that’s embodied by the female part of the common soul becomes the reason for the revelation of the Creator (the Light). Question: If Lo Lishma (?? ????) doesn’t push a person to attain Lishma (????), then the group has to exert its influence on him. How can a woman elicit this pressure? My Answer: With her desire, because she depends on the attainment of the Light by the men’s group. Question: I want to open up a book, read it, and enjoy it. But ever since I started studying Kabbalah I no longer enjoy reading. What should I do? My Answer: Learn to receive pleasure from the Upper Worlds! Related Material: Laitman.com Post: Men, Women and the Soul’s Correction Laitman.com Post: Women In Kabbalah Laitman.com Post: Women Need to Work On Correction Just Like Men A Talk About the Spritual Advancement of Women Share This Less

Two questions I received on relating to one’s environment: Question: In one of your lessons in the United States, you said that people who are ready for a new worldview should voluntarily limit their needs to the minimum bodily necessities for food, shelter, leisure and knowledge. What should we do about the rest of our surroundings such as children, spouses, and parents, who are not ready to limit themselves? Is it sufficient to limit myself while giving those around me what they desire, and show them that my path is correct just through personal example? By the way, I have acted this way all my life, and in return everyone around me tacitly hates me and puts me down. My Answer: If one’s head is “in the clouds,” then he naturally takes no more then the necessities from this world. He does not have to limit himself because this just comes to him naturally. This is the attitude one has when he realizes that the whole world is one family. If the people around you hate you and put you down, it’s probably because you’re forcing them or prohibiting them from something. Question: Can one person make another person feel a lack or need (whether spiritual or corporeal)? My Answer: The environment can evoke or suppress any earthly desire in anyone (see the article “The Freedom”). Moreover, if a person has a point in the heart, the society can accelerate its development. Related Material: Laitman.com Post: Influence of the Environment Kabbalah Today Article: The Freedom Blues Baal HaSulam Article: “Peace in the World” Society as a Condition for Attaining Spirituality Share This Less

Do you: have trouble accepting a compliment? struggle when others offer you sympathy? feel anxious when you get a gift? resist signs of friendship and love? ___ ___ “It’s better to give than to receive.” Our parents teach us this from the time we’re young and society reinforces it. We wondered about the origin of this quote. It turns out that it comes from the Bible. It is more blessed to give than to receive. Do you notice the subtle difference? The statement has evolved into an absolute. It started out as a relative statement. Receiving is a blessing in and of itself. We’re even more blessed when we give. But notice that it’s not bad to be the receiver! Completing the circle Think about it – there can’t be a giver without a receiver. If we can’t graciously receive, we deny the giver the full joy that should come from giving. Unselfish people feel empty if they always “get.” Giving completes the circle. So it’s important to be a good receiver as well as a good giver. Ask yourself “Why?” At its most extreme, not being able to graciously receive may be a sign of an underlying problem. For example, it may mean that there is a lack of self-esteem. Someone may feel unworthy of the gift or the compliment. ___ I think women may have more of a problem with this than men. We often get a compliment and immediately diminish it with a negative statement. ___ Some people feel that they gain power by giving. If they receive something, they owe the giver. Others may give to impress others. Some people give to try to earn friendship. If you really have trouble receiving, ask yourself why. It’s important to find the underlying reason so you can live your life more fully as a giver and a receiver. ___ My mom was one of the most giving people you could have ever met. She seemed to struggle with receiving. One example – she always tried to buy when we went out for lunch or dinner. If I grabbed the check, she protested and protested. I finally told her that I couldn’t feel any joy in her buying for me if she never let me buy for her. After that, she let me take my turns! ___ How to be a good receiver Start by giving without condition or expectation. In order for you to experience the full circle, you have to participate on both sides. Start by giving. Recognize that receiving is part of giving. You bring joy to the giver when you willingly accept their gift.  Be grateful, not objectionable. Some people are so busy objecting to the gift that they take away all the pleasure the giver feels. Don’t immediately bring up all the reasons why you don’t deserve the compliment or the gift. Just say thanks! Receive generously. If you learn to receive as generously as you give, the givers in your life will live more fully. Don’t hold back your appreciation! Receiving graciously is a gift in itself – to you and to the giver. That’s what thanksgetting is all about! ___ Get the tips and tools you need to be a BIGG success! Subscribe to the Bigg Success Weekly – it’s FREE! ___ So today is Thanksgiving and we’re so thankful that you joined us! Check in on us next time as we ask, “Who gets your leftovers?” Until then, here’s to your bigg success! Subscribe to The Bigg Success Show in iTunes.  Subscribe to the Bigg Success feed. Direct link to The Bigg Success Show audio file: http://media.libsyn.com/media/biggsuccess/00274-112708.mp3 Related posts The Most Important Person to Love Why Work Life Balance Doesn't Work Why It Pays to be Late for Work (Image by nosheep) Less

Does anything bring out rude behavior more than the holiday shopping season? People cutting you off in traffic, stealing your parking spot, talking on their cell phone while being checked out, leaving their garbage in stores, and even being physically aggressive on Black Friday! ___ ___ Oprah recently did a show on rude behavior where she highlighted these statistics: Eighty percent of Americans think rudeness is a serious national problem. Yet ninety-nine percent say that they themselves are not rude. So we can only conclude from these results that all of the rudeness must stem from one percent of all the people! Evidently, most of us think that almost everyone else is rude, but we’re not. Test yourself To see how you stack up, she provides a quiz. Here are a few of the questions: Are you chronically late?  ___ I would have to say n…yes. I want to say “no”, but there may be some people who would disagree with me! Too often I think I can squeeze in one more call or answer one more e-mail before heading off to that next appointment. ___ ___ Oprah answered the same way. I know I need to work on this … I tend to be five minutes late to meetings. ___ Have you ever interrupted a face-to-face conversation to take a non-urgent cell phone call? ___ I can’t ever recall a time when I’ve done this. Hey, that means I got one right! ___ ___ I’m good at ignoring the phone when I’m talking to someone face-to-face. ___ Have you gone through a supermarket 10-item express lane with more than 10 items? ___ Well, that depends on how you define the word “item”. If I have multiples of a single item that does only count as one, doesn’t it? ___ ___ I’m guilty by association because I go to the store with you, George. ___ ___ Oh thanks, Mary-Lynn, for blaming it all on me! That’s rude! ___ These questions made us think – things that we don’t necessarily think are rude may be perceived as rude by others. ___ I get annoyed with oblivious shoppers. When it’s December 24th and I’m starting to shop for Christmas, it’s just rude for people to wander around like they don’t have anything to do. They get in the way of us serious shoppers! ___ ___ For me, it’s rude drivers – they don’t use their turn signal. They don’t get over when I’m trying to merge even though there’s plenty of room. Drivers who don’t pay attention are inconsiderate! ___ What rude behavior is a pet peeve for you? 3 rules of civil behavior During her show, Oprah talked with Dr. P.M. Forni, author of Choosing Civility: The 25 Rules of Considerate Conduct. He says our society is structured to encourage rudeness. We’re stressed, fatigued, and in environments with a lot of people we don’t know. For example, we may be one of hundreds of people in a store or traffic jam. His book points out three rules to behave more civilly: Pay Attention Without attention, no meaningful interaction is possible. When we relate to the world as if we were on automatic pilot, we can hardly be at our best in our encounters with our fellow human beings. Acknowledge Others Acknowledge others' existence, their importance to you, their feelings, and the things they do for you. A simple "Good morning" as you walk past a co-worker in the hallway is a perfect example. Think The Best When we approach others assuming that they are good, honest, and sensitive, we often encourage them to be just that. Yet from the results of this study, it appears that we assume the worst in others while thinking the best of ourselves. Sometimes it is dissatisfaction with ourselves that makes us judge others unfairly. Finally, Dr. Forni also says being polite is a healthier way to live. Going through life behaving rudely can make you physically sick.  ___ Get the tips and tools you need to be a BIGG success! Subscribe to the Bigg Success Weekly – it’s FREE! ___ We really appreciate that you took the time to read our post today. Tomorrow is Thanksgiving here in the U.S. We’re going to put a different spin on it and talk about thanksgetting. Until then, here’s to your bigg success! Subscribe to The Bigg Success Show in iTunes.  Subscribe to the Bigg Success feed. Direct link to The Bigg Success Show audio file: http://media.libsyn.com/media/biggsuccess/00273-112608.mp3 Related posts Who’s Kicking Your Cat? Relationship Building Blocks (Image by Abdulic Monkey, CC 2.0) Less

Now, Malcolm Gladwell is taking on success itself, in a new book called “Outliers.” He’s looking at how society and culture determine who we are, and in particular, what accounts for super-success — for the outsized success of superstars. It’s not what you may think, he says. Not genes or bootstrap grit. There’s a whole ecology to it, he says. Time Magazine calls his new book “a frontal assault on the great American myth of the self-made man.” This hour, On Point: Malcolm Gladwell, on the ecology of success. http://www.onpointradio.org/shows/2008/11/malcolm-gladwells-outliers/ Less

Baal HaSulam. Article “Freedom of Will:” “When mankind attains its goal, meaning ascends to the degree of complete love for the fellow man, when all the people in the world will unite in a single heart - only then will all the happiness intended for humanity be revealed in all its glory.” Baal HaSulam. Article “Peace in the World:” “First and foremost, each person must thoroughly understand, and explain to those around him, that peace in society, peace in the nation, and peace on the planet are absolutely interconnected.” Baal HaSulam. Article “The Future Generation:” “The ethical form, determining the life of every nation, primarily must obligate people to bestow to others according to the principle of “love thy neighbor as thyself.” This will be the social consciousness of all the nations. But except for this, every nation can follow its own religion and tradition, and no nation should interfere with another.” Baal HaSulam. Article “The Peace:” “Egoistic resistance between people and nations can only disappear from the world with the help of the Upper Force of the Creator (Nature), if we will wish to unite with Him. This was initially planned in the thought of creation. And if we will strive toward this goal of adhesion with the Creator, then envy, pride, and hatred will disappear, and we will all gather in one heart, filled with the knowledge of the Creator.” Related Material: Laitman.com Post: The Source of Happiness Laitman.com Post: We Must Only Unite Our Points In the Heart Kabbalah Today Article: Love Is the Way Love - The Law of Life Article: “Spirit and Body” Share This Less

Two questions I received on what will happen to the Internet during the crisis: Question: In this great international crisis, plus everything that is apparently still in store for us, it is reasonable to assume that many different infrastructures will be affected, including the Internet. How do you think this will affect the role of the virtual group and our dissemination in the entire world, which happens primarily through the Internet? My Answer: If we use the Internet correctly in order to correct the world, then it will remain, or be replaced by something even more suitable for this goal. Question: Are you still working on materials to submit to the Google 10^100 project? At first everyone was excited about it and there was a lot of talk about it, but now it seems like everyone forgot about it. Will Bnei Baruch participate in it or not? My Answer: We did what we could, and the rest does not depend on us. In the midst of it, the crisis struck. It looks like Google has forgotten about it, or perhaps something is still happening there, but since no one is contacting us, we are keeping quiet as well. To be frank, I don’t believe that such undertakings have good intentions or integrity from the start, but I’m obligated to participate if there is an opportunity. In addition, working together on these projects helps us unite! Related Material: Laitman.com Post: The Internet Is a Reflection of the Society Laitman.com Post: Virtual Lesson on Google’s Project 10^100 Laitman.com Post: The Creator Will Become Revealed Inside the Unity of Our Virtual Meeting Space Shamati #72: “Confidence Is the Clothing for the Light” Shamati #131: “Who Comes to Be Purified” Kabbalah Blog Post: Make a Difference, Cause a Social Change! Kabbalah Blog Post: Better the World Campaigns Strike a Chord Kabbalah Blog Post: Will Project 10^100 Change the World? Kabbalah Blog Post: Project 10 to the 100th by Google Share This Less