Today The Girls are coming to you live from a happy place, where a cancer survivor throws a no-hitter, where the Celtics make it to the conference finals on a wing and a prayer (and Paul Pierce's determination), and Bill Belichick still believes he 'misinterpreted' a crystal clear rule. Where is this happy place, you ask? Why Beantown, of course! We couldn't be happier for Jon Lester (okay, if we were there in person we would have been happier), and while we think they could have done it sooner we are still psyched for the Celtics, and we still can't stomach Bill Belichick! All is right with The Girls so off we go to the This and That of sport. Another Bill in the NFL is clearly jealous of his much younger and better looking defenseman who nearly knocked off the Ice Princess on the latest installment of Dancing with the Stars. Why else would he pull a high school maneuver and stop speaking to him (take THAT!) because he didn't show for VOLUNTARY workouts? Tuna, if you want to get Jason Taylor's rock hard body stop sulking and line up next to him. And prepare to be certified NUTS if you let him get away when the Dolphins desperately need veteran leadership. Taylor has worked harder (Love those jazz hands!) than any other player on your roster this off-season. Kiss and make up already. So is Tim Donaghy telling the truth now? And if so, why does no one care? The guy bet on 100 games over three seasons. He suggests that he's not the only one who has successfully influenced the outcome of NBA games. Our first question is, Why did it take the league so freaking long to figure this one out when they employ former government investigators? Oh. Looks like we just answered our own question. And now Donaghy wants the Scooter Libby treatment. Dude, face it. You're on the menu at Camp Pen. Don't think for a minute that those you've burned are without friends on the inside. On the track The Girls bid farewell to Humpy Wheeler, the P.T. Barnum of NASCAR. He gets the sport, loves the fans, and positioned the sport for the future. But we don't buy for one minute he'll be able to stay away. Chances are you'll see him high up in the stands at Lowe's Motor Speedway taking in the sights and sounds of the house that he built come race day. Don't go far, Humpy! And what would the draft lottery be without another "shocking" outcome? Not fixed, you say? You would be right. And there was. And it is. But we're psyched because Joakim Noah deserves a feisty mate on the floor and the Bulls deserve to have something go their way. Sadly, the Hornets didn't get their way at home and instead lick their wounds as the Spurs tick off everyone and advance. But they didn't get far! Yep, sure, faulty plane. And no one on the ground in New Orleans (Did anyone see David Stern at the airport?) had ANYTHING to do with that. We love a sense of humor. And we'd love us some Lakers V. Celtics. Bring. It. On. Gary Bettman got his wish and now the world waits an eternity for the Stanley Cup Finals to start. Can you say DUMB? But no bother, because we'd wait in a blizzard naked to see Lord Stanley being lifted from his limo and gingerly carried aloft while players turn their eyes from the glare, not wanting to be photographed with or - NO!!! - accidentally touched by THE Cup until it is earned. Did you hear that rookies in the NFL and NBA? EARNED! And in this week's Fantoo Girls sports podcast "Rookie Look", we spotlight Darren Helm of the Detroit Red WIngs who just might earn his first Cup before he even completes his first regular season. Now that would be some wild ride for sure. He's fast, furious and has no clue about how crazy it's about to get on the ice. All positives in our book. Red WIngs - GO FORTH and bring it home. And in this week's IT HAS TO BE SAID we suggest that those who are evolved flaunt their assets! So grab your fishing pole, an octopus or six, and your nail clipper...it's time to talk sports with The Girls! Less